


Self-Conscious

by TrekkieSlut



Series: The Definition of Retirement [3]
Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: The Original Series, Star Trek: The Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Alien Biology, Alien Sex, Anal Sex, Body Image, Body Worship, Bottom Spock, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Masturbation, Mind Meld, Old Age, Old Married Couple, Old Married Spirk Challenge, Slice of Life, Smut, Vulcan Biology, fat positivity, old married spirk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-30
Updated: 2015-11-30
Packaged: 2018-05-04 03:04:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5318069
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TrekkieSlut/pseuds/TrekkieSlut
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Spock has always appreciated Jim’s form, along with all its changes. Jim finds that it is time to return the favour. Written for the Old Married Spirk Challenge 2015 (Set around the end of TFF or TUC, most likely)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Self-Conscious

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there! This is my very last minute submission for the OMS Challenge this year~
> 
> This was originally supposed to be a longer one shot but ended up becoming fluff and porn with character development in it :D (I mean don't pretend you're surprised ehehehehe)
> 
> Nevertheless, I'm very happy to submit this to the OMS Challenge this year, alongside some absolutely gorgeous works I've seen from so many other writers and artists. I'm absolutely in love with everything I've seen this month and I hope that you enjoy my little contribution too!
> 
> (This has only been beta'd briefly along with my own checks so I apologise for any errors.)

A ray of morning light slipped in through a crack in the blinds, striping across the bed and Jim’s sleeping face. The light in his eyes caused him to stir, and he made a small noise as he woke, his nude body twisting in the sheets.

Blinking, he took in the small bedroom, bathed in a dim bronze light. A thin bedsheet was twisted around his legs and between his thighs, his torso uncovered, though he didn’t feel the chill.

The rest of the sheets formed a rising and falling mound on top of his husband, lying to his left on the other side of the bed. Spock’s head poked out from the top of the quilt, his faded hair ruffled where it touched the pillow and the tip of an ear just visible.

Jim’s lips quirked into a soft smile at the sight. He reached out to gently touch the exposed ear, the caress making Spock twitch in his sleep and sink further under the covers. A slender leg slipped out from within the cocoon and Jim heard a deep inhale and exhale.

Jim absolutely treasured everything Spock was, everything Spock did. Moments unbeknownst to his husband like this were absolutely precious to him. “You drive me crazy,” Jim muttered in awe to himself - it was true in more ways than one, certainly, but Jim meant it in one very particular way at the present time.

He was never sure if it was the potency of the t’hy’la bond which did this to him, but Spock brought out stronger passions in Jim than he had ever known. He couldn’t even see Spock properly at the moment, and he had only just woken up for crying out loud, but some mornings this was just how things were. Jim was overwhelmed with emotional and physical feelings of adoration for his lover.

He wriggled under the covers now, aware of much more than just the sheets trapped between his thighs. Sometime between waking and now, or perhaps even before, he’d become fully hard - his erection twitched and dripped between his dimpled, squashy thighs. Gasping, he rolled over, peeled the sheet back and parted his sticky legs, his heavy cock falling onto his belly. Taking the thick shaft in his hand, he stroked it a couple of times.

Jim pressed his head back into the pillows, noticing the covers shift and a small flicker of the bond lighting up in his mind. This was unsurprising, given that Spock was rarely left undisturbed from sleep by Jim’s morning arousal. Jim noticed Spock’s mental presence gradually shifting from sleeping to awake, and the Vulcan stretched, rolling over towards him. He looked over, his lips curling into a sleepy smile as Spock’s face appeared from under the sheets.

Spock’s eyes blinked open, adjusting to the light and flickering over Jim. It wasn’t an unusual occurrence for Spock to blush deeply so soon after waking up either. His eyes were downcast, taking in the sight of Jim’s thick hand slowly stroking his stiff, veiny penis, which was propped up on his rolls of belly fat. He toyed with his balls in the other hand between his spread thighs, watching Spock prop himself up and brush stray hairs out of his eyes, albeit how ludicrously neat it always was even after sleeping on it. Jim licked his lips and sighed at the sight of his beautiful bondmate peeling the covers from his naked body.

“Morning, sleepyhead,” Jim croaked at him, followed by a lax smile. He reached out to caress a pale cheek, letting his fingers tickle down Spock’s throat and over his chest, playfully flicking a nipple. Spock’s pupils were huge when he looked back up at Jim’s face, a warm pulse of affection and arousal passing through the bond.

“Jim,” Spock rumbled as he gathered his lover in close for a sloppy and familiar kiss, his slim fingers cradling Jim’s head and carding through his silky curls of hair. Jim grasped onto Spock’s back and rolled tight against him, kissing him hungrily. Jim’s thrumming penis met Spock’s, slick and easing its way out of its confines within the Vulcan’s hot body as it filled with blood.

Jim hefted up Spock’s leg with uncanny strength, slinging it over his hip, and ground against him, drawing a sharp moan from his lover. Their link sparked between them as their potent desires churned together. Jim rolled on top of Spock leaving him flat on his back, the last of the sheets slipping off the bed and onto the rug.

Bracing his hands on either side of Spock’s head, Jim gazed down at him in adoration. Spock looked rather more wide-eyed and bashful than usual, the green staining his cheeks more pronounced. He even turned his head to the side a little as Jim cast his eyes down his hirsute body, but his arousal was still strong.

“I want you,” Jim purred, dipping down to nuzzle his husband’s face, nipping at an ear.

“I am your mate, I also desire you…” Spock uttered clearly, panting a little. Jim pecked his husband’s nose - Spock could be a little hammy about his intentions sometimes, but Jim knew all his desires as confidently as if they were his own.

The slits of light streaming across the bed passed over their naked bodies as they moved together, confirmed their dedication and love for one another. Soon Jim was kneeling protectively over Spock, pressing down on his flexible thighs as he moved leisurely inside him. Spock watched Jim’s face in reverence and held onto his fleshy hips, clawing hands pulling on his husband’s love handles, encouraging him to thrust deeply.

“Spock-! Slow down, my love…” Jim rolled his hips, sliding his hands sensually down Spock’s arms to intertwine their fingers. As he tightened his grip on the slender hands, Spock’s hips squirmed against him. He brought their tangled hands above Spock’s head and pinned them to the mattress, nuzzling his face into Spock’s throat and kissing him there.

Spock let out a quiet, strangled moan, feeling Jim’s wet, open-mouthed kisses and licks continue over his adam’s apple and to his clavicle. Teeth scraped gently at his collarbones and Spock keened, much to his embarrassment, squeezing Jim’s soft middle with his thighs. Spock seemed caught up in a bubble of his old inhibitions today, for reasons he couldn’t pinpoint for himself, though he still seemed to feel as safe and protected with his beloved bondmate as ever. He wanted to make love with Jim, that hadn’t changed, and Spock was projecting that to his husband in reassurance, Jim responding with gentle physical affection.

Jim caught Spock’s lower lip between his teeth mid-moan and surged forward over him. His tummy dragging over Spock’s wet and slippery member and drawing out a breathy cry from the Vulcan. “You want more?” Jim whispered against his lips. Receiving a positive sound and a mental thrum of desire from Spock, Jim released his hands and lifted Spock’s legs over his broad shoulders. Leaning his weight forward, he easily folded Spock, his cock piercing his husband deeper as his mind had called for it.

Spock gasped and arched hard, his hand reaching for Jim and catching his fingers clumsily. “Let me meld us,” he growled, his glossed eyes meeting Jim’s. Jim smiled gently and lifted Spock’s hand to his temple, where Spock firmly splayed out his fingers, closing his eyes and pressing in. He caught hold of Jim and plucked him up like a thread, winding his lover’s essence around himself.

Opening his eyes now, Jim was more than just above him, cradling him, inside him. He felt more than Jim touching him, he was suddenly the entirety of their bond. As was Jim, his head falling back in lucid bliss.

Pleasure rippled out from the point where they physically joined, Jim gripping the cushiony holds now fleshing out Spock’s hips and lower back and pulling him hard against his own energetic thrusts. Somewhere beyond the confines of their mental reverie Jim was aware that they were truly putting the bed through its paces and it was making a lot of noise, as were their colliding bodies, which thrilled him and egged him on all the more. He squeezed the flesh in his hands and projected into the meld.

_I adore your body. Spock, you turn me on so much!_

Colour billowed across Spock’s features, as expected, his eyes locked with Jim’s.

“Jim…you also-”

_No, shhh. I know you love my body, you tell me every day. Let me return the favour - I can see how you’re feeling, Spock._

Jim slowed his thrusts down and pointedly trailed a hand down Spock’s chest and belly, over the folds and ripples of flesh. It was undeniable that Spock was not as slender as he had been perhaps a decade ago, not currently being in active service and the human side-effects of ageing kicking in. Though it was inevitable that he would put on some weight, it was understandable that someone like Spock, who had stayed so thin with such little effort until recently, would find it hard adjusting to the changes in his body.

And of course, thinking it irrational, Spock would never bring up his discomfort over such a thing. But lately - particularly this morning - it was noticeable to Jim.

He wanted to do something positive for Spock - Spock needed it.

 _Let me be honest. I know that the effects of ageing on your body - the sagging, the extra fat, the greying - has left you feeling…less than optimal._ He petted Spock’s chest lovingly. _I am right. Aren’t I?_

Spock gave a single, slow nod. _You are dangerously perceptive,_ he thought back, with a hint of humour, allowing his lips to flicker. Jim’s grin split his face in response.

 _I understand, Spock. And I need you to know that I will always love you with every fibre of my being. And that love has nothing to do with your appearance, but also everything to do with it. I will always love you completely, along with all the changes to your body, I will always love the way you look. As you will love me. I know it, you’ve reassured me a thousand times._ Jim connected his lips with Spock’s in adoration.

Spock moaned and locked his feet around Jim’s hips, squeezing him in tight. “Jim-!” he breathed, “My husband, ashayam…” His plea went unspoken, but it was all too clear.

Jim was soon thrusting as deep and fast as he was before, his face rosy and blissful and his belly pressed right against Spock’s slit and erection. He drew circles upon Spock’s heaving chest, around his dark nipples and smoothing through his coarse chest hair. His hands slid over the gentle rise of Spock’s pudge and massaged, tracing the faint stretch marks over his leathery, dappled skin. Spock watched Jim’s gaze travel down the length of his body, no longer feeling as self-conscious, and sent feelings of deep trust and adoration through the meld. Finally Jim’s hands slid around to his buttocks and squeezed, and his smirk clearly indicated that he had indeed noticed that his lover’s bottom also now had extra padding. Blood surged into Spock’s cheeks once again, much to Jim’s delight.

He didn’t need to reinforce it with words. Spock felt all the love Jim had pouring through his fingertips and it was driving him over the edge. He panted hard and his hips jerked back against Jim, the pressure of his oncoming climax rumbling up through the meld.

Jim watched as Spock’s brow furrowed, his face screwing up and his throat tightening moments before he orgasmed with a strangled cry, hot come pulsing from his cock and onto himself and Jim. Jim felt it all, rippling like an aftershock through him as he burst in pleasure inside his husband, his release sweetened by the clench of the hot, come-slicked channel around his cock.

_Just like the first time you came…so beautiful, Spock…_

Spock’s hand slipped from Jim’s meld-points and he stroked his bondmate’s stubbled jaw, the connection ebbing away. Jim pulled his spent cock free and wiped excess lube from it on the sheet, urging Spock to roll over onto his side so he could curl up behind him. Jim nuzzled in-between Spock’s shoulder blades and Spock wriggled back, snug and cushioned against him.

“I love you,” Jim’s muffled voice could be heard in the quiet of the room.

“Taluhk nash-veh k’dular,” Spock responded softly, linking his fingers with Jim’s over his messy stomach. “We are going to be sticky.”

“Yes, I know. We can shower soon. Are you cold?”

“No.”

“Good. I just want to stay here awhile and hold you…” He squeezed Spock’s middle gently and smiled against his back. “I know I can’t fix your discomfort with my words, Spock…I just hope I can make you feel as beautiful as you make me feel.”

“T’hy’la…you already do.” Spock closed his eyes and pressed Jim’s fingers to his lips.

The sun’s beams had almost fully traversed the bed by the time they rose to shower, joints popping and bodies satisfied.

**Author's Note:**

> I see a lot of fics about Spock worshipping Jim's body which are so lovely but I've seen people comment that Spock does get a little pudgy in the later movies too. I always thought that he'd probably have his own insecurities about that and that Jim would be all too willing to shoo them away.
> 
> A few notes of thanks:
> 
> \- boomdeyadah as usual who is always there to give me words of encouragement and feedback ;w;
> 
> \- plaidshirtjimkirk for making the OMS Challenge happen!!
> 
> \- and you for reading!!! All your words of encouragement keep me writing and if you'd like to leave a comment, even a couple of words, I'd be so thrilled :3 And I really hope you enjoyed!


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